7 Quick Takes: The Birds and The Bees

17 Days To Go

Saw the OB doc yesterday and looks like I am not dilated or effaced in any way.  Unusual for me at this stage!  No biggie though…well, there is some pun intended there, cause I am huge!  I feel like I can only stand now for 5 to 10 minute stretches of time;  Add holding Goldilocks to the mix and I am out.  We usually end up snuggling in the computer chair since I take up more room going forward then I am wide.  Speaking of which, my stomach measures a whopping 41”!  Crazy!  This is my second pregnancy, though, out of six, where I gained the minimum not maximum weight recommended.  I am attributing it to my workouts early on, though I haven’t worked out since the back issue and the viruses spread through the house.  I am OK with that though since it has allowed me more time to Blog : )

Right now I am at 23lbs and figure I will top off at 25 lbs.  Considering the last 2 were 37 lbs, it really has made all the difference. This has been one easy pregnancy, considering!  Don’t get me wrong, I just had another sleepless night but really this has been unusually easy for me.

—2—

Birth Control does include Condoms Ma’am!

OK, small rant here:  So I saw a different OB yesterday, as mine was in surgery.  Very nice doc, actually they all are at this secular facility.  I am blessed that my personal OB is the only Catholic one there! 

Well, in speaking with this OB, she wondered what my ‘plans’ were for future pregnancies and I quote, “Are you planning to have more children?” 

I thought, legitimate question…

I replied, “Well, we are open to it…though I would like to have them spaced out a ‘little’ farther than 12 months…{insert laughter}!  But seriously, we use NFP so I am hoping we get a little better at it…giggle…but we are still sort of newleyweds you know!”

Her reply, “So then you use condoms or some other barrier?” {seems very concerned here}

I replied, “Uh, no, do you know what Natural Family Planning is or as its also called Fertility Awareness Method?”

Her reply, “So then you’ll be breastfeeding, I guess?”

Umm…seriously?  Are our OB docs so brainwashed into prescribing ‘the pill’ to alleviate our fertility burdens that they are completely unaware of natural methods to space out or avoid a pregnancy? 

She thought NFP was just breastfeeding or condom use…   And the condom questions, well, I actually have heard that a lot, even with good Christian women.  Somehow they have come to believe that if you are not on ‘the pill’ then you are not using birth control…hmmm!

Quick Catechism here:

God’s intent for sexual union must not be Against-Life or Contra-Ceptive.  All marital consummation (trying to make this a little more kid friendly) must be unitive and pro creative.  Hence all forms of Contraception are “evil” in God’s eyes.  The Creator did not intend this for His Creation…therefore we simply don’t do it.  This includes pills, condoms, sponges, barriers…anything that blocks unity and creation.  NFP, as one can argue, Controls Birth but is not Contra-Ceptive or Against-Life because you abstain during your fertile periods.  Therefore, the couple still remains open to God’s will.  NFP uses God’s creation (The Body), to promote God’s will.  Every time a couple unites, they tell God, like Jesus, “Not my will but yours be done.” {written here by the hubby, he wanted to put in his 2 cents}

—3—

“Green Sex”

So, my husband was on trip to Ohio to drill with his Marines and felt the Holy Spirit call him into adoration at a Catholic Church along the way.  As he was walking out, he saw a ton of those amazing Lighthouse CD’s and so he grabbed like 5 or so.

Both he and I are very knowledgeable about ‘Theology of the Body’ but one CD by Jason Everet really inspired him and he would want me to share it with you.  It’s called “Green Sex: The Case for Natural Family Planning.”  The greatest part of this CD is the mainstream media he quotes and uses to establish that Catholics enjoy the act, and statistically, enjoy it better than others…

PS: Jason and his wife Crystallina are an amazing, holy couple living out God’s plan for marriage and inspiring young people and old in their many books, CD’s and talks.  You have to check them out!

—4—

“Contraception, Why Not?”

And even more on NFP… try “Contraception, Why Not?” by Dr. Janet Smith.  She’s so down to earth and practical when she speaks about contraception.  It really applies to people of all faiths!

—5—

The Birds and the Bees

So while we are on this sex topic, which frankly I didn’t plan when I sat down at the computer, but one which reminds me now of last weekend’s conversation with my 11.5 year old.

  She informed us in the car that ever since a boy in her 4th grade class last year began making comments about sex all the time… things like, ‘under the sheets and kissing,’ she has been trying to put the pieces together as to what exactly sex is, how it happens, and whether or not we would tell her explicitly about it or if she would hear it from her friends. 

Well, long story short, based on what was hinted at by this boy, the Bible, the movie “Esther,” and some other ‘clues’ she asked, “Is it like an electrical outlet?”

I said, “Well yes!” 

Both my husband and I were caught off guard with the topic and what we perceived as a little young for the details, we realized we were quite prepared because we ourselves had learned exactly what “sex” is based on theology not on movies, porn, music, books, or TV shows.  So, it was a beautiful conversation, needless to say!  I was so grateful at how we approached it with her. 

Laying down that foundation that sex is sooo beautiful made it easy to talk about in that light.  Telling her that sex is for intimacy and creating life took the ‘dirty and awkward’ feelings away for all of us.  We made sure to emphasize that because creation/life is involved that sex was designed for marriage unlike what the rest of the world believes, that it is simply for pleasure.

—6—

Resources for Your Talk

If you are thinking about that talk too with your teen, or in my case, pre-teen, and feel unready or ill prepared, these are amazing resources.  And by the way, they make for good education for adults too.  I would read these first, give it to your child, and then go through it together.  I would NOT just let them read it and ask later, “So, any questions?”  Not a good plan!

We plan to buy these to add to future discussions because that’s just it, it’s ongoing, and well, we have 5 more talks to have…for now:

—7—

Do You Want To Be Different?

Like I said, I didn’t start this off to be a catechism talk, but it took off that way and I just let it flow. 

And that’s just it, it flows from humility and gratitude for where the Lord has brought my husband and I; to a place of peace and joy when it comes to sexuality.

We both sadly, at one point in time, lived the way our world told us would be pleasureful but hit rock bottom when we realized it was not the lasting joy that God had created for us.

We needed to be different!

When we turned to God, opened our hearts and received everything he had planned for us (and you), and that’s when we began to experience immense joy—in both our unique femininity and masculinity; in sex and in creating life. 

We finally were living with a purpose!

Amen!